You are but who u think u are

I cant believe that tdy's gone. Its times when u r working and doing the stuffs u have to do, that u put more emphasize on the quality of time spent everyday.

Ok not that blogging is sth i love but hey. How can i not blog my weekend. Coz thats the only time i am doing things i chose to do.

So...hi huishan!!! If u ever read this. =) Was the gurl's birthday party tdy. Honestly it was better than the last coz i had tv and sofa and nice cake and loads of presents and marcus!!! The boy i mentioned in my first few entries! Well....i guess he forgot abt me man but who cares! He was crazy tdy..playing and having fun. Its good to be young and carefree. Speaking of which. Stupid kids swimming tdy had no care whatsoever abt me trying to swim! I kicked a few of them in my attempt lar... hee hee damn. Its like the devil-may-care attitude when they are swimming and splashing. I was never like that as a kid. My dad said when i was young i was already acting reserved like an adult. Yuck. Hate kids who act like adults and arent carefree.

So...thats not the point of my entry. My friend was feelin a lil down tdy and i was trying to think of ways to console him. This doesnt link but there is a classmate of mine, whom pple think is probably the most screwed up person in class, in school, in whatever. Lets just say he is a lil different. He doesnt necessarily portray a good image. Ok he has like no image. And he has difficulty making friends coz u wouldnt wanna be near him or be associated with him if u wanna be accepted and perceived as cool. Pple make fun of him and his desire to prove himself as a good singer. Thing is he doesnt sing too well in my opinion...but he takes singing classes. From what i know he is very devoted and probably practices real hard. Like william hung!~ But he is less cute i would say...

Ok. point is. I never made an effort to talk to him or get to know him as a person throughout the 2 years that we've been classmates. I dun find any reason to. And i think he knows that, coz he doesnt talk to me. In fact i think pple diss him so much its easy to laugh at him and think he's weird. So i am indifferent to him. But he doesnt take it personally. In fact i think he enjoys the attention he gets when pple laugh at him. So tdy i had my first real conversation with him. I started it! Was sitting beside him so i decided to make the best out of it. And not be a bitch. So glad that i did coz it was funny. Ha. He told me he consulted his councillor in camp for advice on stress related matters at work in NS. Think he is a clerk. And his councillor told him the way to make his life better is to bootlick his colleagues! And tt's what he did! hahahahahaha I find it mildly amusing that i can be amused with him. =)

Was good.

So... its remarkable how he has so much more in his life compared to me. From the outside u probably think he is pathetic (being brutally honest). U probably wonder if he has any friends, friends that dun make fun of him and care for him.(which he does). But he is the greatest simply becoz he thinks so and knows so himself. He believes in himself so much, that it doesnt even matter when u and I dun c it. Its like the olympic games advertisement that i saw on tv recently. It was narrated by Andrea Bocelli, this blind tenor...it was sth like :" U can have the body, the strength, the talent but u still won't be successful as the strongest muscle u have is your heart." Sth like that i cant remember... but it's the same way this guy is. Everything that he doesnt have compared to the rest of the guys...i guess he compensates it with guts.

Its easy to say this - that life's about knowing what u want and being happy knowing you've tried ur best to achieve it. And to think of it, he is the one person who remains undeterred and consistent with his dream. Ultimately it doesnt even matter whether he gets into the Singapore Idol. (did i tell u he is auditioning?) He would still be happy knowing he tried. I guess for me a lot of times my dreams get forgotten and i've mastered the art of excuses to not see my desires fulfilled. Now i've come to this stage and i've deserted some stuff along the way. The more setbacks i have, the more afraid i become. The more i retreat, the more i lose the fight. But whatever it is, this entry aint abt me. =)

Not alot of pple are gonna be best friends with him but at the end of the day i guess his presence is felt and he made a difference to everyone who knew him. Including me.

Say you. Duncha wish u had his spirit?