vIsiTinG TiMe

chilling after my third paper....paper was ok!~ Was the most hilarous open book exam yet!~? Had so much stuff to bring in, everyone was trying to balance their calculators and pencil cases on their stack of books and notes. Wat a joke!~!!

U know its like i have these few days break between my 5 papers... and everytime a break comes it feels like i get visiting time from jail and i get alil happy and breathe in some fresh air...but then these breaks dun last for long n soon i gotta start cramping for my paper again and it feels like the jail guard says TIMESUP!~ and off i go back in the cell again!!~ Ofcoz after next week i'd have served my time and then will have 6 FREE days before I go back to jail....So u oughta book me man or forever hold ur tougue coz 6 days is just 6 days man!!..Yeah baby.... i've got Professional Attachment....lalalalalala

OOooooooOOOOooo i had my first good sleep before a paper last night? And guess what chew!!!!! I dreamt of the korean B****!~ The dream was like this!!....we were in a library and... mich was ard... then veron was ard.... and...er.....OK..i dunno what was in the dream!~ Its pretty much content-less if u'd say~ But she was different. Dun even remember if it was her man actually....bleah.

CheErs!!!!! ------ To cOoL dReaMs!!!!!!!!!

OMG

=) i just finished my second paper. Was a ok

Bought FHM for 6 bucks. I know. =O cant help myself. Britney was on the cover man.

I just d/l this Penny and me mtv??? My god guys.... Zac has grown so much i was thinking who the hell is that!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well.... still prefer him small really. But he's still cute alrite!~@

Think i'm gonna have my first C this sem......Chilling though....

Lets c....think i'm actually more happy then when i wasn't having exams!?!? Happy but well stressed lar...i dunno howta say it but its like u cant afford to be too sad during exams!? Coz u gotta focus. And when u have focus there is meaning, and the exams restrict u so much so that u find that sth to look forward to when it all ends. Thank god for exams!

Lovely lovely lovely.

iF oNLy

They R back!!!!! =)

Hanson's new song is penny and me!~ what a dumb name but well...the brothers are back. And they rock!~ =)

This's a song i love by them. If i could i'd put song on blog but well.... can't.

If only. Middle of nowhere album......

Well every single time I see you I start to feel this way
It makes me wonder if I am ever gonna feel this way again.
There's a picture
tearin
in the back of my head
I see it over and over
I wanna hold you and love you
In my arms and then
I wanna need you
cuz I need to be with you till the end
Then I hear myself reply "You've got to hold it in" this time tonight

If only I had the guts to feel this way, if only you'd look at me and
want to stay, if only I could take you in my arms and say, I won't go cuz I
need you

Sit here waiting, wondering, hoping that I'll make this right
Cuz all I think about is your hands, your face and all these lonely nights
There's a feeling screaming in the back of my head
Saying it over and over
I wanna hold you and love you
In my arms and then
I wanna need you
cuz I need to be with you till the end
Then I hear myself reply "She'll never let you in" this time tonight

If only I had the guts to feel this way, if only you'd look at me and wanna
stay, if only I could take you in my arms and say, I won't go cuz I need you
I wanna hear you say it'll always be this way

And we'll be hand in hand for everynight and everyday
I wanna scream and shout cuz rules are never doubt
And all I care about is you and me and us and now
If only I had the guts to feel this way, if only you'd look at me and wanna
stay, if only I could take you in my arms and say, I won't go cuz I need you

Please don't go cause I need you now
Yeah. Cuz I need you
If only, yeah cuz I need you now
If only cuz I need you, I need you
If only , cuz I need you
If only cuz I need you
If only, yeah, if only...I need you now....yeah

thE HoLe IT LeAvEs BehInD

How do u measure love?
By the hole it leaves behind...

----- Princess moon, Blueprints

Love's perceptions

It's supposed to be insane, it makes u crazy
Insanely jealous, insanely insecure, insanely irrationale
Insanely insane
It's so fast its exciting.
Ur heart's beating.
Finally beating.
Destructive is its middle name
Involves chunk of fighting crying hurting
It makes u feel so alive u wanna die

The heaven on earth
A higher pedestal of living
Souls unite as one being
I'm looking at you looking at me
Could do this forever and say i found life's meaning
It's so right we have no fights
It makes u so happy now u wanna cry

I DoN'T bELieve iN manY thINGs bUT iN u I dO

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Ever wondered how ur life looks like in someone else's eyes?
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Hey been a week man whats up. OC just ended. Ryan's hurt man. U ever been in a place where u think u cant possibly screw it up more coz its real screwed? Once. Twice. Somehow its a threshold, u recall it to find strength in urself. At the lowest of ur low, u managed to survive.

But there's no stop button to shit that comes. In a way stimes u feel u ought to be prepared. Like gosh i cant be too relaxed and chill, theres got to be some way to be alert and prevent lousy stuff from occuring. But then thats tiring. Feel like ur living it on the edge. Ur so scared to fall u must as well just fall off... would it make a difference if u knew the exact time u r gonna fall?

I saw this old man tdy on the train tdy with my fren, he looks frail and sick....there were these MRT pple guards whatever u call them in uniform surrounding him. and then one of them just accompanied him on the train. And i saw him again ltr at my station at my house. Two different times there. Maybe he has no money to travel. Maybe he was sick and needed a ride. I wonder how he survives u know. U ever saw someone and felt sypathy and with that came absolute gratefulness of how u have the things u have in ur life? And i dunno how it goes but did god make these imperfections to the extreme to make us realise whats truely impt in a life? What is impt to him...Same humans, same world, so different lives.

When the end comes, and it sure does, what matters to me now and what i cared abt will be so out of place i wouldnt believe it myself.

Now...u dun know me like i want u to if u think i am writing this coz of stress or depression. Come on. Give me a break.

Guess what i really wanna tell myself is ...

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Ever felt that sudden joy in ur lungs u need to do sth to make it last.
And did it ever occur to u that theres no way u can make it happen again unless u keep experiencing pain
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SaY...ArE yOu GoNna Be My GuRL?

see she is writing this for a reason. And the reason is you.

Nah...

She wakes and packs up stuff in hall.. yesterday was the last night ever. Didn't even spent it with her roomie but well. She doesnt care. So she goes for lecture, talks and complains more...eats flour-ish fish and chips in hall 3 (never eat that man).

She returns on a shuttle bus, thinking of how its probably gonna be the last time she sits on it. Makes conversation with a hall fren, discovers that she is also not stayin in hall next sem. Good!

And then, an hour later she's carrying a huge amt of stuff back home. At home she slumps on the bed...sleeps for 3 hours. She has cramps but still honours a slow 30 min jog.

And u would think that she'd be feeling pretty good after that eh. BUt no. She returns and realise tenant is bathing.Damn.she takes F O R E V E R. And she realised, that her brother, who spoilt her computer chair last week, spolit the keyboard this week =). And being the lame old her....she actually started crying. Before that she blamed her bro ofcoz. Her bro couldnt be bothered with it, He is a pieceofcrap.

So at the lowest of the low. She finally got to bathe. Hungry to the core now coz its already 830. And there! Family din really leave any dishes behind! Pissed. She fried her own egg with tomato. Her mum scolds her for being picky when there is SO MUCH FOOD ALREADY?!?!??!??!?!

And here comes the reason she is dong this. AT 11pm she watches OC!!!! =) Oh man she knew it was gonna be good. Finally! So pple......go watch it!

Love the show. Love life.

An AH meng escaped from the zoo and drowned .... he must haf thought that the grass was greener on the other side. Aww man May's gonna be upset if she knows this.

Ungrateful

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Just think how happy you would be if u lost everything u have right now,
and then got it back again.
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31st March, wednesday

Mood swings. Mum's b-day. How old is she? Dad bought Green tea cake. He asked what cake i wanted to eat. And so that was it. Mum has everything to say about it. She has everything to say abt averything. So even if we bought her the world there's no way she'd be happy. Would it be this way for me. Why did he ask me if its her cake. Coz my parent's system is mal-functioning. Adults. Men. Women. Birthdays.

Brother went to the art museum. I would really like the idea. Abstract art, semi abstract art, expressionism. They say that pple who perfect art adopts an outsider's perspective of the world. They r not the daily u and me. Detachment is key. They capture what u dun c. What the stupid u dun c. =)

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1st April

Butterfly effect.
U ever thought about it? The truth is this. You're probably in the best place in your life that u could ever be. Even if u did manage to change sth u were not satisfied with. Life would never be perfect ultimately. Not perfect enough. Not for u at least. You're here so just enjoy the rest of the journey.

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2nd April

There's sth called blessing in disguise. We found an fyp tutor who's a million times a better person than that bitch was. Mr Jeff Kennedy. =)

2 quizes later i'm still me. There's little time to breathe. 2 quizes to come. Another free rider. Jerk. Asshole. I want an epidemic to swip them all.

Passion of the christ. Ought to love our enemies. Would spent a life time creating passion in me. But i actually sobbed for him. Jesus...

The inability to pick myself up when down almost makes me handicapped.
Ofcoz I still believe u learn so much when u r really upset over something. But not when ur upset over nothing. But when shit manages to get u down like it does to me... I pray u haf the strength to ignore the shit.